An Ungodly Relationship
Many of us pray and hope for a long-lasting, God-centered relationship. While God’s timing is perfect and He desires to be involved in our journey to love, the path to finding the right person can sometimes feel frustrating, especially when we think we’ve met “the one,” only to be disappointed because signs of an unGodly relationship are starting to show with the person we are with.
In today’s culture, dating can be even more challenging for believers. But the Holy Spirit, who is our guide and counselor, can help us discern whether someone truly aligns with God’s purpose for our life. Here are 6 key signs that they may not be the person God intends for you to be with.
1. They Give You Mixed Signals
“For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace…” – 1 Corinthians 14:33
Confusion is never from God. If someone is hot and cold, saying one thing and doing another, or leaves you constantly guessing where you stand, it’s a red flag.
A person who is aligned with God’s will for your life will bring clarity, not confusion. While no one is perfect, their actions should be consistent, transparent, and rooted in honesty.
2. They Are Emotionally Unavailable
Godly relationships are marked by mutual emotional support. While only God can fulfill us completely, your partner should be emotionally present, encouraging you, speaking your love language, and pointing you toward Christ.
If you’re the only one initiating conversations or investing emotionally, it becomes draining. Relationships require effort from both parties. One-sided pursuit is a sign to pause and evaluate.
3. They Don’t Align With Your Purpose
“Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” – Amos 3:3
Your partner should complement your God-given purpose. Relationships ordained by God reflect His glory, just like Abraham and Sarah, or Mary and Joseph. They had shared destinies that amplified their faith.
If your values and life goals are misaligned, it’s a warning. Purpose is central in the life of a believer, and the wrong relationship can derail your destiny.
4. An Ungodly Relationship will Pull You Away from God
The person God has for you will lead you closer to Him, not away. It’s easy to be captivated by someone’s personality, but true character is revealed over time.
If you notice your spiritual life declining, your convictions being compromised, or a disinterest in God’s Word and church, this is not the relationship God wants for you.
Recommended Books: Boundaries
5. There Is No Foundation of Friendship
You’ve probably heard that “friendship is the foundation of every strong relationship.” That’s not just a cliché, it’s biblical wisdom. Marriage is largely companionship, and genuine friendship creates space for honesty, laughter, and trust.
Don’t skip the friendship phase. It helps you see the real person without romantic pretense. And even if it doesn’t work out romantically, HEY!!! At least you’ve gained a friend.
Also Read: 8 Signs This Is The Relationship God Wants You To Be In
6. There’s No Confirmation from God in an Ungodly Relationship
This doesn’t mean you need to chase signs and wonders. But God does confirm His will through peace, His Word, and spiritual alignment.
Look for the fruit of the Spirit in the person (Galatians 5:22-23). Are they gentle, patient, kind, self-controlled?
- For women: Does he love you sacrificially, as Christ loves the Church? (Ephesians 5:28)
- For men: Does she demonstrate a respectful, Godly character? (Ephesians 5:24)
Ask God to be part of your decision-making. He knows you better than you know yourself.
Recommended Books: Boundaries
Final Advice on Ungodly Relationships
Dating as a Christian can be challenging, but with God’s help, it doesn’t have to be confusing. Be prayerful. Be discerning. And trust that God is faithful to lead you to the right person in His perfect time. Remember, You don’t have to settle for someone who isn’t aligned with God’s will. His best is worth waiting for
Also Read : 8 Signs This Is The Relationship God Wants You To Be In
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